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There once was a governor who taxed his subjects heavily to pay for his protection of their liberty. One day, two people representing themselves as great tailors from afar arrived and sought an audience with the governor. They told of an amazing new fabric process they had invented, a fabric made of gold fiber that only the best, purest and wisest of people could see.The governor asked to see a sample of this miracle fiber. The tailors brought forth a spool. "Isn't it lovely?" they said, knowing the governor was the wisest of people--why else would he be governor?
You and I would have said the spool was empty. However, the governor, being wiser than you and I--and flattered that these two strangers would recognize his wiseness--said, "Indeed, it is lovely." To have voiced his suspicions that the spool was empty would have exposed his dull stupidity. Then, to test his ministers, the governor convened them to obtain their opinions. He and the tailors explained the power of the fabric to them. They conferred, then they agreed that this was, indeed, the finest and most beautiful fabric they had ever seen. With the backing of his cabinet, the governor then ordered a new robe, veskin, pantaloons, stockings and shoes--all to be made from the new miracle fabric.
The tailors took the governor's measurements. The governor ordered the treasury to give gold to the tailors from which they could weave the invisible fabric.
The tailors worked night and day. The pile of gold at one end of the worktable disappeared as they wove it piece by piece into the invisible fabric which they wove on their loom. They cut and they sewed the invisible fabric as the governor and the ministers came by to admire "the finest robe any governor would ever wear". The tailors, of course, were running up huge expenses. Weaving an invisible fabric is very hard work. They ate well and slept well and had lots of women, and sometimes men. Swindling tailors have large libidos. This, they put all on the credit card of the governor's country.
Finally, they announced a delivery date. A holiday was proclaimed. The people came forth to see the governor's new clothes, which they had heard much about, and which they had gone hungry to pay for, and for which their children would also pay all their lives. The governor donned his non-existent veskin, pantaloons, socks, shoes and robe and strode forth onto the streets of his capitol. The people saw he was naked, and hushed in disbelief. A minister, sensing trouble, began singing loudly, "O hail the new robes of the intelligent governor! O hail the governor's choice of fabrics! O hail the tailors to the governor! O hail the ministers to the wise governor who were wise enough to choose this new fabric! O hail the bonus to everyone involved!"
The crowd began sighing. "It's the most magnificent work I've ever seen." "Magnificent!" "I wish I had such lovely fabric in my life." "The governor should be carved into stone on Mt. Plushmore for having the foresight to tax us for this lovely suit of clothes." The governor, inspired by the praise, paraded proudly, wagging his fat and portly body at his subjects, fearing that at any moment they would discover that he could not see his own nakedness. Then he wagged in front of a young boy. The boy said to his father, "But the governor is naked."
The father said, "The boy is innocent. He knows what he sees." The crowd repeated to one another what the boy had said.
Then everyone knew that everyone had been tricked by the swindlers. The people knew that the governor had tricked them and had spent all their, and their children's, tax money on a farce. The governor heard the people murmuring. He knew they were right. He was too proud and too frightened to admit he was wrong and a fool. So he continued to act like a fool. It had worked so far.
The governor held his head high and looked down his nose at the crowd, the only way he knew to avoid exposing his humiliation. The governor continued the procession--wagging his fat and portly body in front of his subjects--and his ministers held the train of his invisble cloak higher than ever. They were proud to be asked to hold the train of an invisible fabric, because it meant that they were more intelligent than most.
The people looked on silently as the governor and his ministers completed their parade and headed back into the castle. The governor turned and, wagging his fat and portly body at the crowd, said, "Since you love this suit of clothes so much, I shall immediately beknight the tailors, and commission them to create another, even greater, suit of invisible fabric." The crowd's cheers followed the governor into the castle.
When the applause died, and the crowd began to head for home, someone heard a young boy ask, "Did everybody think the governor had some clothes on?" "Shh," said the boy's father. "They're happier not knowing you know."
